An unwritten page in my life......

It's been 21 long years, a journey that has made me a somebody.All along this journey of mine I have had to listen to millions of comments that friends ,family, relatives had to say to me but never have I paid much heed to them.I have always been me.


All this time I have been told that I don't completely exhaust my true potential.I can do wonders but the wonder that is inside me never shows its wonderful face.People just try to convey the message that "you are one lazy fellow".Recently it's been tough realising what kind of a person actually I am.It feels that i have always been overrated.I am what i have been all along, not what people make of me.

I had been a king in a small world.When i set foot in the hostel for the first time it hit me bam ! on the face ,with the realisation of falling in a talent pool.I still didn't pay much heed to it but hung on.Recently ,trying to think out of the box I am getting bottled up.My creative side is not manufacturing new things.Though I have settled in this pool, still not as a member but as a person who is trying to keep afloat his sinking ship.Overrated is what i have been.....that has been a true realisation.

I just try to be somebody at the end of the day, but It's just not the cakewalk i used think it was.The competiton is getting heated up daily and one false move will get you bogged down .I have always shunted idea of competing with friend and have always been there behind them, now I feel it's about time I turn turtle and get my act together and realise my actual potential.Now no more fantasies ,just real practical stuff that's going to put me(hopefully) on the map to be visible with my actual identity.

Magic.....

Loving every moment of my life .Friends are funnier than ever and I have made quite a few interesting new buddies. Few of them have left for their work commitments and the ones that are here are making every second of my life cherishable. Rediscovered a few really good companions. Life is hip and happening with not a single drab moment. Close people have come far closer and I have become a lot more responsive towards everything. My outlook has changed a lot. It’s really surprising how a company of a group of caring people can change a person so much. It’s really amazing….


Had a lot of ups and downs but never let my spirits drop, that’s me. The ever cool , calm and safe guy(some people don’t like me being so safe).My approach to life is very boring but I am a lot of fun when people get to know me. I am really amazed to see the new found confidence that has evolved in me. Now my perspective is that the world needs to catch up to me and not the other way round. I am actually the real impersonation of happiness. The only thing that I am proud of is that I think a lot about everything and everyone. I try my level best to keep everyone happy, and someone else’s tears really sting my heart . Whatever I say is straight from the heart and I love to be loved. My proud possession is only my heart and nothing else. I love my parents more than anything else in the world, they are my living GOD and nothing else matters. I have received the love and companionship of a very special friend of mine and to him I will be indebted to for all my life………

So I am going through a phase of transformation for the good I hope so….or is it ??? I have no idea about the change but the real thing is that the little things in life that had waned away into the oblivion are resurfacing and really they are creating the much required MAGIC……

forgiveness

Friends been very forgiving. Friends come and go, some stay on and become a part of our life. Have come across someone very special . It’s been long since I have written but straight from the heart have found a “Best Friend” hope it materializes.


I came in touch with old friends from school after a long time, and now it seems like that I am the one who has stayed aloof from them. One of them said they miss their friend. Keeping a Friendship alive has been tough, but coming close to someone has changed me a lot, still hoping for further changes to come into me. Right now I feel that I too missed my friends a lot ,and my ignorance has just kept me away. Trying to get back on all the things I have missed in the last few years.

It’s kind of asking for forgiveness from people who are close to me. The connections are hard to ignore now and the love is tough turn away from.

To the very special friend thank you. And to all am sorry and will try to make up………………..

BAPTISED BY THE RAINS

The rains have finally touched down on the lives of the people. It’s great to see it bring respite to many and disgust to some. The slow motion suicide that people undertook for the past few days by going out in this sweltering sun has hopefully come to an end. The temperatures would finally come down and we hopefully can say that the Nor’westers have built there base in the south of Bengal after a practice session in the northern part of the neighbouring states.

I am really overjoyed to see the rains from my balcony. It’s just pouring out here that’s what I have been thinking all along. What a night its going to be!

The smell of wetness is just wonderful, my favourite smell living in India. Rains here in Bengal at this hour are really awesome. The sky just lights up and the thunder is awesome. Anybody would be awestruck by the winds and there devastating effect on the temperature.

I had tried to shoot the lightning strike with my digital camera but couldn’t but someday I will. It is the lightning that fascinates me the most. I have been hooked to them from my childhood and now the intensity has turned a new leaf. The rain drops falling on my skin and trickling down slowly really is some sensation that can only be felt and not talked about.

About today’s sudden spell…..Hell broke loose as soon as the wind developed a gusty attitude. It was mayhem all around. People rushing to take cover from filth zigzagging on the streets and on them. Now they understand, hopefully, what they throw on the streets  actually is not very romantic. Umbrellas going haywire, clothes blown away etc etc etc….are the little things that happen when a sudden outburst of nature blinds the mundane. There was dust swirling and getting into all kinds of places. Amidst all this romantics a corpse was being taken to be burnt. What a tragedy! A beautiful night marred for the bereaved family.

I saw people on the roads running to take cover.. “Take Cover” are you kidding me, getting wet in the rain is so much fun and the “adults” find it quite childish. Oh ! who cares .I messaged my friend as I could not control my emotions and had to share it with him. He too was enjoying the same darn thing .Yeah that’s it the rains have officially created a wave by registering its first successful spell. The Ganges looks stupendously beautiful. And as night has set in it really mirrors the lighting with great might and makes a beautiful canvas. The cold air is making me feel sleepy. The beautiful rains has touched my sweating little heart.

Drops that touched the heart........

Phele asha din

 I was browsing through my photo albums and i felt quite close to the people i don't see that often but were an integral part of my childhood.It made me cry but the photographs actually made me connect to my past.It felt pretty good to see the toddler in myself after so many years.My grandfather carrying me here and there......My cousin's young faces were so adorable..The fact that few of them are married and even have kids made me laugh at those innocent faces.I haven't got many near and dear ones ........For me my mom and dad are GOD,but few people I was close to , like my aunt;felt great to see her photograph again.It was a revelation after many years.These closed boxes of memories,forgotten, just brought back a life in my ever so dull day today. My mum and dad's marriage photographs were just ubercool to watch. I flogged my dad showing him his past photograph and asking him to compare him to it now. The change was evident,he felt good too,actually he saw his young hay days.........

My take on all this was that it made my day today.The photographs really were a memory churner for me......